The unusual time that the Easter weekend has landed this year means that today is the day that many kids across the UK will have to haul their arses into school after a two week break.
Because of this, I thought I’d try to remind them…erm…what they go to school for.
And because my admittedly-rashly titled series where I try to bust the Monday morning blues doesn’t really translate to something I’m posting on a Tuesday morning.
And because kids need to learn that you can start loads of consecutive sentences with the words “And because” if you want to.
And because I think this is a bloody great pop record.
Busted – What I Go To School For
Nope, you’re right. I have no shame.
For many years now, I’ve been utterly baffled by some lyrics which I didn’t understand.
Given the artiste in question, I assumed that they were probably a bit rude, too rude for transmission on any radio channel that didn’t want to be snowed under by an avalanche of complaints.
It’s a section of the song which appears to be sung/played/recorded backwards, but I still managed to interpet as sounding a bit rude.
And then one day, admittedly quite a long time ago, Hel sent me this:
I’m almost disappointed to learn it’s just the previous line sung backwards.
Still, Missy rules, so here it is in all it’s (very rude indeed) glory:
Missy Elliott – Work It
I’m still not convinced, mind.
…since he’s gone to all of the bother of getting crucified, shoved in a cave and then rising again, all over one weekend (and because I haven’t posted any HMHB for a while), it seems only fair that I post this:
Half Man Half Biscuit – Tonight Matthew, I’m Going To Be With Jesus
Look, I know this weekend’s post haven’t been very interesting, but at least I haven’t mentioned Brexit.
I’m thoroughly enjoying the latest series of BBC Drama Line of Duty; it’s shaping up to be the best yet, with more twists and turns than a twisty turny thing (to quote Blackadder).
Of course, to fully follow it, then you have to be up to speed with what the oh-so many acronyms which appear on the show mean: there’s AC-12 (the Anti-Corruption team whose investigations we follow in each series), who this time are trying to track down a UCO (Under Cover Officer) who has infiltrated a OCG (Organised Crime Group) but who has gone AWOL (you probably know what that means, to be fair) and more than a little bit ROGUE (erm, rogue).
Which reminded me of this series that I started just over two years ago, wrote exactly one post, and then forgot all about.
What I’m hoping for is that at some point, this acronym will appear in the show and I’ll maybe understand what this song’s about:
Naughty By Nature – O. P. P.
Shortly after I’d asked my mate Martin for a suggestion for last week’s post in this series, I came up with one which I decided to postpone until today.
When I was a youngster, the album this was the title track from was often played as the family droveover to visit the grandparents and great-grandparent every Saturday. I would sing along in the back, totally oblivious to what the song was about. It wasn’t til many years later that I actually listened to the words properly and realised that the main character is, to be perfectly blunt, an absolute shagger and a shit.
I had some form in this area, you won’t be surprised to learn. My Dad owned a couple of those Rugby Songs albums which were popular in the 70s, recordings of jock-strap wearing mountains of men singing bawdy songs in pubs, with the most offensive of words (usually) bleeped out to protect the tender ears of any young pup who may have strayed into hearing range.
But that hadn’t stopped me learning the words to an old-time music hall tune which featured on the record, and, as my teacher subsequently reported to my parents, I had been singing it in class…at lunch breaks…at any possible opportunity, basically.
This isn’t the Rugby Songs version, but you get the idea as to what so tickled kindergarden-aged me about it:
Derek Lamb – The Hole in the Elephant’s Bottom
But I digress.
Here’s the song I was originally talking about; it seems appropriate in a perverse kind of way to be posting a song about a devil on Easter Sunday:
Kris Kristofferson – The Silver Tongued Devil And I
They’re not exactly known for their acoustic, sensitive side, are The Jesus & Mary Chain.
No, they’re more renowned for fuzzy guitars, Phil Spector Wall of Sound meets Brian Wilson-esque melodies, all drenched in swathes of glorious squealing feedback. Or growling glam rock-inspired stomps.
But they do have a quieter side – they released a whole album of acousticy songs, the much under-rated Stoned and Dethroned.
This isn’t on that particular album, rather it’s the closing track on 1989’s Automatic album, and it’s one of my favourites, short and sweet:
The Jesus & Mary Chain – Drop
I can’t let the week end without mentioning Wednesday evening, when one of the most incredible football matches I’ve ever watched took place in Manchester City’s Etihad Stadium.
For those of you who don’t follow football at all, it was the second leg of the Quarter Final of the Champions League, and City were playing my beloved Tottenham Hotspur.
Spurs held a slender 1-0 advantage after the first leg, not something I anticipated for one second we would hold on to, for City at home are an awesome opponent, who we’ve come unstuck against on many occasions over the past few years.
The match kicked off at 20:00 hours, and what happened over the next couple of hours was exciting, breath-taking, tense, controversial, and goals, lots of goals – in short, every thing a football fan hopes for in a game. A great advertisement for the game, Bryan.
Bit of a spoiler on the title of this clip, mind:
I’ve been a bit wary of VAR up until now, but now I bloody love it.
Dan Hartman – Instant Replay
We play City again later today, in the Premiership. I absolutely expect them to have their revenge and absolutely batter us.
But until then, something to appease City’s fans, an olive branch if you will:
Morrissey – Disappointed