Clive Bruce – A History of Dubious Taste

Sunday Morning Coming Down

Here’s a first for these pages: some South African country music.

The artiste in question is so obscure, he doesn’t even have a Wiki page in English, just one in Afrikaans. In fact, type his name into Bing rather than Google, and the top two results are a 192.com entry and one for a financial consultant. Both of which could be the same guy, to be fair.

Anyway, here’s what the translated Wiki page has to say about him: “Clive Bruce is a South African country singer and stepchild of Virginia Lee [Nope, me neither – Ed]. He made his first recordings as a backing singer and bass player in the 1960s. Later he mastered the keyboard, drums, guitar and other instruments. In 1971 he reached the number one position on LM Radio’s hit parade, as well as the 11th place on the SA Top-20 Hit Parade with Sally Sunshine . In 1981 his hit If You’ve Got Nothing On reached number 16 on the charts and in 1996 his album One Last Kiss achieved gold status.”

Before we go any further, reverential deference is demanded of anyone who has managed to crack that tricky LM Radio market.

I’ve checked though, and this chap got nowhere near the UK charts, so I can only think I heard today’s record back when I was a kid, listening to Terry Wogan on BBC Radio 2 of a morning as I devoured my Weetabix. And for some reason that I cannot fathom, it has stuck in my memory. Similarly, it would seem, in nobody else’s either.

As an aside, do you remember all the fuss when Terry hosted an edition of Points of View and the tightness of his trousers attracted lots of complaints?:

I’m saying nothing.

I loved and admired Sir Terry, and you should be thankful I’m not going to make you listen to his version of The Floral Dance. Well, not anytime soon, anyway, but I wouldn’t rule it out completely.

But let’s be honest, today’s record is the sort of thing he’d play, if for no other reason than for the double entendre in the lyrics. He knew how to handle a double entendre, did our Tel: