The Chain #36

And we’re back! Back! BACK!! (obligatory Smash Hits reference for you there.)

Here we go with another dose of interactive blogging; you all know how this works by now, so we’ll crack straight on.

Last…erm…time, we left you with “C30 C60 C90” by Bow Wow Wow and the usual plea for your suggestions for songs that can be linked to that tune.

Younger readers may not know what the C30 etc in that title stands for, so allow me to explain in a slightly patronising tone.

Many years ago, music as we know it today did not exist. MP3s was the name of a robot from Star Wars (probably); the term “streaming” meant that water, or some other liquid, was flooding out of something.

Back in those dark days, us old timers listened to music via the radio, (sometimes referred to as the wireless, but let’s not go there or things will get really complicated), or cassette tapes. These could either be purchased pre-recorded, or blank, onto which we would record the vinyl records (some naughty people recorded songs from the radio, which is definitely not okay, as we will find out), and these cassette tapes were then played on cassette players or, later, on portable devices called a Walkman. The length of the blank tape varied, and the 30 signified you could record thirty minutes of music onto it, the 60 held sixty minutes, and so on.

I mention all of this to save any puzzled looks when we start going through the suggestions, for many of them refer to that medium of music presentation.

For example, first up, here’s Charity Chic from Charity Chic Music:

“C30 C60 C90 refers to taped music [okay, you’ve put that a lot more succinctly than I just did…] – you can tape to tape and in days gone by this would be in the form to reel to reel tapes. So Reel to Reel by Simple Minds from when they were good please.”

“From when they were good”, eh? Well, that certainly narrows things down quite a bit:

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Simple Minds – Reel To Real

Reel to Real, you say? Well, if you’re going to suggest that, then I’m going to suggest this lot:

r-47885-1282972620_jpegReel 2 Real feat. The Mad Stuntman – I Like To Move It

That Mad Stuntman, he really was quite mad, wasn’t he? Textbook lunacy, there. Lovely stuff.

Over to Rigid Digit from Stuff & Nonsense who ventures: “Can I get away with 3 suggestions in one comment?” You can, but I will of course break them up into three separate suggestions and post them all out of sequence and context.

“1) C30, C60, C90 – all variants of the most portable music delivery method [Can you all stop putting that more succinctly than I did please?] Now all you need is something to play them on whilst on the move. Aah .. the Walkman – which leads (in my mind) to a roller-skating Cliff Richard in the video for Wired For Sound.”

It’s the stuff of dreams, if you’ve eaten far too much cheese before bedtime, that video:

That bit when he’s driving…does it remind you of anyone….?

May not make the midnight deadline now, as I have literally just watched that about ten times.

Anyway here, for anyone who may want to listen to it and be reminded of all that lycra again, is the single:

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Cliff Richard – Wired For Sound

Just when you thought we might be all Cliffed out for this week, here’s Alyson from What’s It All About, Alfie?:

“I remember well dancing to Go Wild In The Country by Bow Wow Wow back in the day (Mr WIAA,A?’s predecessor and I used to do a bit of show-dancing to that one) but another song about being In The Country (but not being wild) was by Sir Cliff & The Shadows back in 1966. Sir Cliff is also a great tennis fan and although this is tenuous, Annabel Croft was our British female no. 1 for a while and the lead singer with Bow Wow Wow was also called Annabel(la) so a double link.”

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Cliff Richard & The Shadows – In The Country

Quick! Someone suggest something slightly more credible!!

The Great Gog steps up to the oche.

“I suppose there’s also the very relevant “On Tape” by The Pooh Sticks.”

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The Pooh Sticks – On Tape

Over now to SWC from the very much still alive and kicking When You Can’t Remember Anything:

“I will be heading, like Charity Chic, down the tape route. I will start with the excellent ‘Freak Out’ by Tapes ‘n Tapes”

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Tapes ‘n Tapes – Freakout

They’re a band that have managed to pretty much pass me by, are Tapes ‘n Tapes. I remember reading about them, but never actually hearing anything by them. I think I was put off by the missing apostrophe from the other side of ‘n. Time for me to investigate some more, I think.

Here’s Rol from My Top Ten:

“The Pooh Sticks were my first thought, but I knew I’d be beaten to that, so I offer the far more obscure…..”

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Dan Bern – Tape

And here’s The Swede from Unthought of, though, somehow:

“C30, C60 & C90 were all commercially available cassette tape lengths [Ahem…! What did I just say….?] (as was C120, but who used those?) [Erm….] and the Bow Wow Wow song in question was the first ever cassette single. Pete Murphy of Bauhaus famously appeared in a TV advert for Maxell cassette tapes, so I’ll go for ‘Bela Lugosi’s Dead’”

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Bauhaus – Bela Lugosi’s Dead

Brace yourself now, as we are about to step into the nerdy world of which cassette tape was our weapon of choice back in the day. Welcome back, Alyson:

“The tapes of choice for me were usually made by Philips which was a Dutch company and 2 Unlimited were Dutch…… Oh no, did that link last week time.

Include another L in Philips and you have the surname of half of the members of The Mamas & the Papas and I don’t know about you but “All the leaves are brown and the sky is grey, I’ve been for a walk on a winter’s day, I’d be safe and warm if I was in L.A., California dreamin’ on such a winter’s day.” Yes it’s a bit of California Dreamin’ from me.”

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The Mamas & The Papas – California Dreamin’

And here’s Dirk from Sexyloser to chuck his thoughts on the matter in:

“For me it always had to be BASF cassettes, they really were the best. Although, somehow, they smelled rather disgusting, strangely enough ….”

They say the olfactory sense is the most powerful in terms of invoking childhood memories, so let’s see what that little sniff and scratch session has brought back to Dirk’s mind:

“I was thinking about other famous people with a nice mohawk (‘cos that’s what always impressed me mightily when looking at Annabella [of Bow Wow Wow] back then … that and her figure, of course … I always thought she was smoking hot! Still admire her today, to be brutally honest! Perhaps I should be careful these days when saying such things, bearing in mind she was only 13 or 14 when the first singles came out, and I don’t want to end up being the one with the paedophiliac stamp in future posts of The Chain! Then again she’s two years older than me, but does this fact legalize my continiuing adoration? Interesting subject, once you think about it …”

You do realise you’re talking out loud, don’t you Dirk? Reign it in, old chap.

But before you do, here’s Martin to add a little background to Dirk’s ramblings:

“Annabella Lwin of Bow Wow Wow was famously photographed for the album sleeve art with not too many clothes on, despite being a minor. Cue tabloid frenzy and a visit from Scotland Yard for Malcolm McLaren. And on that basis, I’ll make my suggestion, an ode to being sure she’s old enough…”

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Travis – U16 Girls

Back to Dirk, who hopefully has had time to have a cold shower. Dirk, fancy picking up where you left off, and maybe coming up with something which not only links to the subject record, but also to Martin’s suggestion?

“Famous people with a mohawk are Mr. T out of the A-Team of course, but also Robert de Niro as Travis Bickle in ‘Taxi Driver’, which gives me a fine opportunity to annoy George (again) and link to The Clash and ‘Red Angel Dragnet’ [because it features several lines of dialogue lifted from the film]

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The Clash – Red Angel Dragnet

As is traditional, Rol picks up the mohawk baton (which, surprisingly isn’t a euphemism) and kind of runs with it, as far as this:

“Mohawks lead me to recall Pop Corn & The Mohawks – ‘Custer’s Last Man’.  Worth a spin if you can find it”

Ok..

Two minutes later, Rol posted this:

“P.S. Having listened to it all the way through again now… you must dig it out. It is utterly mental.”

Blimey, Rol, give us a chance!

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Pop Corn & The Mohawks – Custer’s Last Man

We seem to have got a little way away from the subject in hand. Anyone care to drag us back to the whole tape thing?

Oche vacated, here’s Swiss Adam from Bagging Area

“Wild Billy Childish and the MBE’s ‘He’s Making a Tape’ (‘and it’s not for me’ she sings, Billy’s wife, Nurse Julie)”

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Wild Billy Childish and the MBEs – He’s Making A Tape

Continuing the tape theme, Martin’s back:

“Following the C30, C60, etc, into the land of mixtapes, how about ‘Press Play and Record” by Lois Maffeo?”

I could only find the same song credited to just Lois, so I’m hoping this is the song you had in mind:

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Lois – Press Play and Record

Back to SWC now, with his second choice, and his second choice by someone who has passed me by, mostly because I’ve always viewed him as a Billy Bragg wannabe, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but we’ve already got one Billy Bragg, so…

Anyway, having listened to this, I may have to reassess.

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Frank Turner – Losing Days

SWC: two shots on target, two goals.

Go on, have another go.

“You could also go down the mixtape route which is regularly used by rappers taking us nicely to the odd future tape and ‘Slow it Down’ by Tyler, The Creator.”

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Tyler, The Creator Ft. Hodgy Beat – Slow It Down

We’re almost at the end of the Tape links, here’s Dirk with one more, no build-up, no pre-amble, just introduced by the words: “Clever, eh? But this happens when you remember every old shit no-one else knew all along!):

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The Membranes – Spike Milligan’s Tape Recorder

First appearance of the week now from Jules of Music from Magazines fame:

“One of the best uses of tape in a promo video was of course in “America What Time Is Love?” By The KLF.”

It took me ages to work out what he meant. See if you can spot the reference:

Jules will be back shortly with some actual suggestions. Some of which I may even allow.

I haven’t suggested anything for a while. Feeling a bit left out actually. So how about I wrap up the Tape section with one of mine?

Every now and then, post The Chain, I get an email from George, telling me how much he loves a song that I’ve posted. They are always the songs that I least expect him to like, which is a mark of the man. George, I mention this because, going off some of the previous ones you’ve told me you enjoyed, you’ll love this, if you don’t know it already (though I would imagine you do).

Tidying off the tape section with another Reel song, here’s The Chemical Brothers:

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The Chemical Brothers – The Private Psychedelic Reel

Oh and George: next time you email me, there’s no need to attach the video clip of you dancing round your kitchen. But if you must, please can you be wearing some trousers next time? Or at least some underwear. Thank you.

Okay, before we move on to the next batch of links, a couple of random ones. First up, is Alex G from We Will Have Salad:

“Let’s play Chain Letters! Take Bow Wow Wow, change a letter, and you get Bow Wow Now, which is a song by Dubstar”

Quite a short game, really, that, wasn’t it? I suggest you work on a second draft before submitting it to one of the major TV channels. Although, stick the word ‘Celebrity’ at the start of it, and Channel 5 would probably be interested in it right now:

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Dubstar – Bow Wow Now

And since we seem to have stumbled into the vague area, here’s the aforementioned George:

“From Bow Wow Wow, to violins (played with a bow) and to some prog rock, namely King Crimson and ‘Larks Tongues in Aspic Part 2’ , which has some violin-ing in a splendid racket of a song.”

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King Crimson – Larks’ Tongues In Aspic, Part Two

One of the other recurring themes that came up after last week’s time’s source record, was home taping, the hobby/habit/thriftiness/call it what you will that so many of us of a certain age indulged in in our youth, sitting hunched and “hovering over the Pause & Record buttons on your knackered old tape recorder when the Top 40 was on a Sunday evening…cursing when you accidentally taped even the briefest snippet of Bruno Brookes…” as I once described it elsewhere on these pages.

This was known as piracy, which led two of the Chain Gang to come up with suggestions.

First, here’s The Robster from Is This The Life?:

“One thing immediately comes to mind, and it’s a double-linker! C30, C60, C90 Go! was a song about taping music off the radio – music piracy. The pirate skull and crossbones flag was called the Jolly Roger. Bow Wow Wow consisted of ex-members of Adam And The Ants, also formerly managed by McLaren. Adam banded together a new bunch of Ants and modelled himself as some kind of glam-punk pirate, recording a song called ‘Jolly Roger’ on the album ‘Kings of The Wild Frontier’.”

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Adam & The Ants – Jolly Roger

And then came The Great Gog, who I am used to receiving a suggestion from at around 3am the morning after I post The Chain. This time, he has a rather unique way of coming up with a suggestion:

“Like Robster, I started thinking of piracy, in particular the old cassette and crossbones logo that used to adorn many an album cover back in the early eighties. “Home Taping Is Killing Music – And It’s Illegal”, that one. This set me wondering how quickly I’d find one of these if I were to randomly pull out a few records from my vinyl collection. Around a minute or so as it turned out. The Psychedelic Furs’ eponymous debut LP was the album in question. Did any particular track lend itself to The Chain? Well, much home taping was done from the good old wireless, so a case could be made for “Blacks/Radio”. Of course, I’m now wide awake listening to said album through headphones when I should be sleeping like the more sensible members of my family…”

And I suppose that’s my fault, is it…?

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The Psychedelic Furs – Blacks/Radio

Mention of the ‘Home Taping is Killing Music’ campaign reminded me of this alternate logo, which always made me chuckle, and which at least one other blogger used to use on their website. Can’t remember who, suspect it may have been Dirk, but wouldn’t want to swear to it:

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I had that made up into a couple of t-shirts (for myself), so I probably owe somebody something for that blatant copyright breach. Ah well. Join the queue.

Anyway, where was I? Ah yes, the Home Taping is Killing Music thing. Here’s Rigid Digit with the second of his suggestions:

“2) Fuelling the Home Taping Is Killing Music campaign, the cassette single of C30, C60, C90 … Go had a blank side – this also led to the band parting company with EMI.
The logo was used in the back of Venom’s Black Metal album with the words ‘Home Taping Is Killing Music… So are Venom’…Venom have a place in my ears, but if I’m honest, they really aren’t that great…”

Don’t start backing down before we’ve even played it, Rigid!

So, here’s some words I never thought I’d type. Ladies and Gentleman, I give you Venom:

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Venom – Black Metal

Now I know I mentioned in jest that I wouldn’t post Rigid’s three suggestions in order, but truth be told, they do pretty much work in that order, fair play. So, here’s his third:

“3) The 21st Century equivalent of home-taping is downloading, so no pre-ambling explanation: Weird Al Yankovic – ‘Don’t Download This Song’.”

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Weird Al Yankovic – Don’t Download This Song

It won’t have escaped your attention that musically that’s based on this:

My two favourite bits on that song are when Cyndi Lauper comes on and kicks some ass (vocally), and (long term readers and friends, forgive me for making this joke yet again), the bit where Bob Dylan does his impression of Cartman from South Park.

But I digress, yet again.

Having allowed Rigid’s  three suggestions to appear almost uninterrupted and in sequence, I’m going to break with tradition and allow the same thing to happen with babylotti’s.

But first, round our way, whenever someone name drops, we tend to shout the word “Clang!” It is often bawled at me when I start regaling people with stories of all the bands and comedians, some on the way up, some on the way down, some going absolutely no further, that I worked with, albeit usually only for one night, back at the end of the 1980s/start of the 1990s. I mention this now, apropos of nothing.

Over to you, babylotti:

“Being from Coventry the thought of bootleg tapes immediately brings to mind my first serious music love, Ska. Or Two Tone Ska as it’s become known as.  So my first suggestion is Gangsters by The Specials with the line ‘Why must you record all my phone calls…’ [I’ve had the privilege of playing as drummer with several members of the band since]…”

Clang!

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The Specials – Gangsters

“…My next suggestion is staying with the same scene & to suggest The Selecter & On my radio, the 1991 version is better IMO. And I’m proud to say I actually deputised as their keyboard player for one gig, a very happy moment!”

CLANG!

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The Selecter – On My Radio (1991)

“…And lastly I’m going to link to Tom Robinson’s ‘Atmospherics: Listen To The Radio” for the radio link. And lets face it, we all used to tape stuff off the radio, didn’t we?”

CLA – oh. Sorry.

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Tom Robinson – Atmospherics: Listen To The Radio

Two more categories to go now until the big reveal, and unsurprisingly, we’re going to the dogs now. But before we do, a quickie from Jules:

“Songs with numbers in title, how about Culture’s ‘Two Sevens Clash’..?”

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Culture – Two Sevens Clash

To the dogs! And one from me, from an album that I’ve had for a while, but never really given it much of a chance; not sure why, probably partly because I’d not been fussed about their last one, partly because with Hooky gone I didn’t think they’d sound anywhere near as good, despite the decent reviews the album got.

But then the other night, the Iggy Pop growled his way out of my speakers on a tune I didn’t recognise. This one:

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New Order – Stray Dog

A change of pace now, and here’s Badger from When You Can’t Remember Anything, or rather, Mrs Badger on his behalf, as he had much more important things to sort out at the time:

“Greetings from the mountains. Mrs Badger here.
Tim wishes to link to ‘Old Brown Dog’ by Ralph McTell.
He’d tell you himself but he’s at the bar getting me a mojito.”

I had to check twice to make sure she hadn’t put us all to shame by submitting that in the form of a haiku.

Here’s Ralph:

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Ralph McTell – Old Brown Dog

Two Ralph stories.

When we were kids, although I have no recollection of my brother going to stay in Germany (and I know I definitely didn’t, I tend to remember that kind of stuff), we played host for a couple of weeks to a German exchange student by the name of Ralph. And of course, part of the task of having a foreign exchange student is to teach them about the British way of life, sample our culture, teach a little history even.

It was only years later that it occurred to me that perhaps there were less inappropriate,  more tactful places of interest that we could have taken a young German lad, away from his family for the first time, than the Duxford Imperial War Museum, which has, amongst many other things, a permanent Battle of Britain exhibition.

Ooopsies.

Second Ralph story isn’t really a story, but everyone who knows me knows that having featured a song by Ralph McTell, I simply cannot resist posting this:

Over to Jules, again, who is now in full on pun mood:

“Been feeling a bit ruff lately so I thought I was barking up the wrong tree with the cassette link until I did my sums

30+60+90=180 degrees, a complete turn around

Of course the link is Bow Wow Wow

And what do you do with dogs (quiet at the back)?

Run with them”

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Pet Shop Boys – Suburbia

Of course, any mention of Dogs, and there’s one person who we just have to mention:

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Snoop Doggy Dogg –  Gin and Juice

I don’t know if this particular story crossed your radar a couple of years ago, but it’s a prime example of why television interviewers, like barristers, should never ask a question that they don’t already know the answer to. Especially when you’re interviewing a Welsh farmer who has recently met Mr Dogg, and who drops da bomb at around 01:18 on this clip:

Here’s Jules with…a less successful suggestion:

“Oh! As mentioned many times Bow Wow Wow lead’s to dogs which are canine….. Sounds like K9 to me the robot dog in Dr Who

Put all the ingredients [including the earlier KLF reference] into the blender and simmer for a while and one gets

The Timelords’ ‘Doctorin’ The House’.”

Apologies Jules, but I can’t allow that one as it’s featured on The Chain before (The Chain #28, to be precise, before you started frequenting these pages, I think), and is therefore now off limits.

When I get time, I’ll set up a page listing everything we’ve posted here so far. Might take me a little while as we’re fast approaching the 800 mark, mind, but it will happen sooner or later, as I do hate having to disqualify a perfectly good suggestion on these grounds.

So, we’ve done dogs, but what about dog noises?

Here’s Martin:

“Bow Wow Wow is the noise a dog makes, as described by a child… who might describe said dog as a doggy… hence:

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Patti Page – (How Much Is) That Doggie In The Window?

“Twee but terrible,” he continues, before going on to suggest what is unquestionably the Worst Record of The Week. “So how about the noise that dog makes? In which case, “Ruff Mix” by Wonderdog, in which sampled barks are used for lyrics?

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Wonder Dog – Ruff Mix

“Fascinating (debatable) fact,” Martin adds, “the human voice of Wonderdog, in promo appearances, was none other than Simon Cowell in a dog suit – mindboggling and depressing in equal measure. Also twee but terrible.”

If only he’d stayed there, eh readers?

Two songs to go, and it’s at this point that I suddenly realise I haven’t sorted out the next song in The Official Chain which we’re all trying to either guess, or better. Bit of an oversight by me that.

I’ll leave you in Rol’s capable hands whilst I sort that out. Rol, it’s all yours, and try to pad it out a bit, will you?

“If you want a link that requires (a little) explanation, then…Bow Wow Wow is the sound of a dog barking, so…”

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I, Ludicrous – Trevor Barker

“(Actually, that didn’t take much explaining at all, did it? Must try harder.)”

That’s it, is it mate? Cheers.

Okay, last one, and last one from me. Following on from that, here’s Underworld’s “Diamond Jigsaw”. The link? It’s from their album “Barking”. I thank you.

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Underworld – Diamond Jigsaw

Before we have the final record, can I just say that all that up there that you’ve just read, that’s why I love doing this, and that’s why I don’t want to introduce any maximum suggestions per person. For where else would you hear Bauhaus, Snoop Dogg, The Pooh Sticks, Wonder Dog and King Crimson in the same post, other than here at The Chain?

Apart from on Charles Manson’s record player, of course.

So, to the official tune, and some of you got within a whisker of the link, if not the actual tune:

“C30/C60/C90 – types of cassettes. Cassettes were made by Dolby…”

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36. Thomas Dolby – Hyperactive!

Can’t really argue with that, can we?

So, your suggestions please, via the Comments section below, for records that you can link to Thomas Dolby’s “Hyperactive!”, along with your explanation on the links you propose.

And don’t forget, we’re moving to Sunday as of next post, so the next edition of The Chain will be with you the first weekend in February. Feel free to make your submissions as early as you like though.

Thanks for your time.

More soon.