Don’t worry: on brand as it may be, I’m not really going to have my first proper post in months feature a track by The Frantic Four.

In fact, I’d prefer if you didn’t think of this as a proper post at all.

I’ll explain: I’m still signed off work, as I continue to suffer from the problems, pain, and loss of movement and strength in pretty much all of my joints as a result of my recent psoriasis flare-up, and this is most pronounced in my legs and hands.

I can only walk with the aid of either a walking stick or a frame; I struggle to open or grip things, and writing and typing is difficult and painful, to say the least.

So, no, this isn’t a a proper post. What this is, is rehab. I’m due to have my first consultation with a rheumatologist this Friday, but in the meantime I figured I needed to take matters into my own hands – literally – and start trying to do some of the things I’ve struggled with recently.

And so here we are.

The plan is to try and post a few short pieces here – probably relating to my progress – every now and then, in an effort to get myself back to something approaching normal (whatever that is).

This seemed appropriate to soundtrack my sort-of-return (and it’s a banger):

Martin Solveig Feat. Dragonette – Hello (Original Mix)

More soon (but probably not too soon…).

Same Title, Different Song

If you’re reading this, it means the post I had hoped to publish on Saturday morning remains incomplete, and will probably turn up later today. And no, it isn’t the next edition of The Chain, and yes it is a Rant, which I always have to research and source quotes and which consequently takes up a little more time than the usual guff I post.

Such as this.

In 1964, The Beach Boys released this, which became their first Top Ten hit in the UK, and their first #1 in the US. You can tell it’s still early days for the band from the photo on the sleeve of the single, which is clearly taken before they settled on the Hawaiian shirt look:

On a wet weekend, when many of us are forbidden from venturing outside anyway, this is exactly the cheerful, summery content you want, right?

Whenever I hear The Beach Boys I am immediately taken back to the night I went to see Adam Buxton perform live at a venue in Islington. He was trying out old material, checking to see what still worked in front of a live audience, as he would shortly be recording and releasing a live DVD, subsequently released under the moniker Adam Buxton’s Old Bits. The show was utterly hilarious, but the crowning moment came at the end, when he launched into the introduction of a piece I’d seen him do on 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown.

A murmur of recognition spread across the theatre as he began this bit, closely followed by a sense of excitement. The clip he played seemed longer than the one he used on 8 Out of 10… but in all honesty it was difficult to tell as I was laughing so hard I very nearly fell off my chair.

Sadly, said clip used to be on YouTube, but since it became available for commercial release, it’s been blocked/removed, but I have tracked it down to a post on Twitter. Hopefully this works:

Such a simple joke, but so perfectly, meticulously executed.

If the Rant post doesn’t appear later, it’s because I’ve re-watched that so many times. Not even sorry.

And as for the song with the same title? Well, there’s probably loads, but I’m plumping for a song which celebrates female promiscuity. I recall offending a very dear lady friend of mine (by “dear” I mean much loved, not expensive) by telling her that this song always reminded me of her, for she would often (and with the benefit of hindsight, I meant occasionally) regale me with stories about scrapes she had gotten herself into when hooking up with boys. For legal reasons, I will not be naming her.

This is a total banger, by the way:

More soon.