S.S.O.S. (Stop Spoiling Our Songs)

In these troubled times of Trump and Brexit and all the rest, it’s very easy for us to lose sight of the most insidious, creeping evil in modern times.

The appropriation of great records to try and sell us stuff we neither want nor need.

Broadly, the version of a once great classic that appears in adverts falls into one of two categories:

  1. A whimsical, piano backed cover version, usually performed by an unknown, but breathy female singer, or
  2. A version with altered lyrics, which now mention the actual product.

But rarely does the actual song itself feature, which I assume is something to do with whoever owns the publishing rights for the song in question.

I would dearly love to see some statistics showing the success of these ad campaigns. Do they actually work? Because whenever I see one of those adverts, I immediately pledge to never buy anything by the company putting the adverts on.

There’s one on at the moment. I’m not going to name the company it aims to promote, but it’s for a travel agent who has recently changed it’s name, which I imagine is so that it has the same name as it does overseas (see Marathon bars becoming Snickers, Opal Fruits to Starburst) and definitely not as some sort of tax dodge.

Anyway, the first time I saw that advert, I knew that when I next go on holiday, I will not be booking it through them. (I rarely go on holiday anyway, but that’s not the point.)

So a new thing here, where we reclaim the song back from the capitalist pigs.

And here’s the song in question, which has recently had all life sucked from it. Give it back, Ad Men, it’s not yours to suck!

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Rufus and Chaka Khan – Ain’t Nobody

There will almost definitely be more of these soon. Suggestions welcome.

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