50 Ways To Prove I’m Rubbish #14

I can explain why I didn’t buy this one at the time.

It is 1983, I am 14 or 15.

And I hear today’s record and think it’s the most mind-blowing record I’ve ever heard.

I pored over the lyrics in Smash Hits, sang along whenever it came on the radio.

But still, I didn’t buy it.

And why not?, as Barry Norman used to say.

Because nobody I knew at school liked rap or hip-hop, and I didn’t want to stand out from the crowd.

Bit pathetic really.

I look back on this record now and wonder just how cool my friends may have thought I was had I ‘fessed up back then about loving it.

This one:

Grandmaster & Melle Mel – White Lines

Still genius.

Welcome to the weekend.

More soon.

How Not to Do a Cover Version

1983 saw the release of this absolute classic:


Grandmaster Flash, Melle Mel & The Furious Five – White Lines (Don’t Do It)

The act name is a bit of a misnomer though: Grandmaster Flash played no part in this record having already left the Sugarhill Records label that released it.

Seriously, what a tune that is. And it’s impossible to listen to it without at the very least joining in with the “Baby” parts, as evidenced by the song’s appearance in the wonderful popular culture  referencing “Sean of the Dead” movie:

As for the godawful cover, well I suspect most of you know what’s coming. Brace yourself.


Duran Duran – White Lines

Given their reputation in the 80s, I’ve never worked out whether or not this cover is supposed to be ironic. Or just hypocritical.

Not that it matters. It’s awful, ironic or not.

More soon.