Home Furnishings

It’s a Bank Holiday (again) here in the UK, so (and again, with apologies to those who do have to work today) there’s no need for the usual New Mood on Monday post today.

Instead: a while ago, I briefly had a series on here called Art (I say brief: 2 posts in total is probably beyond brief) where I talked about some of the various pop culture references which adorn my walls – predominantly, but not exclusively, prints of album covers I love.

Since I’ve moved home though, I found the need to buy something my old flat never had – a doormat. But I didn’t want just any old doormat – I wanted something which fitted in with the pop culture feel of the stuff that covered the rest of the house. ‘I have pop culture references on the walls, so why not the floor too?’, I reasoned to nobody but myself. (Regular readers will be aware that pop culture is not just limited to the walls in my pad, for I own a pair of these, courtesy of my brother. I bought him a Sisters of Mercy clock for Christmas, but there’s not a song about that, so it’s not nearly as clever.)

So the search began, but nothing I found fitted the criteria, all too bland, or too “nice” and a bit too welcoming. No, I wanted a doormat which reflected my personality and, more specifically, my love of music.

And then I stumbled upon a place who do bespoke doormats; just send them what you wanted to have printed on it, and they would oblige, stamping your design on to the bristly little dog-dirt wiping bugger.

But now, faced with this blank canvas, I had to decide what should decorate this otherwise bland household item.

At first, I toyed with the idea of having the blog’s DJing Elvis logo on it, but wasn’t convinced a picture would come out so well on such a canvas, so I rejected that idea.

Words, that was what was needed. Something to replace the “Welcome” one normally finds on such things.

My next thought was to get one with the word “Binky” written on it, in reference to this tune, from (arguably) R.E.M.’s last if-not-great-then-at-least-pretty-good album:

R.E.M. -Binky The Doormat

Knowing how much I love R.E.M., you’ll be surprised to learn I rejected this idea too.

Instead, I plumped for a reference to this old skool banger:

Kicks Like A Mule – The Bouncer (Original Mix)

And here’s the frankly ruddy marvellous cover from Klaxons – 2007’s Mercury prize winning, next big thing (and promptly never heard of again) – which, if I’m totally honest, I prefer to the original:

Klaxons – The Bouncer

All of which means that in the unlikely event that anyone ever visits, this is what they will see when I open the door (with apostrophes in the right place):

Yes, you’re right: I am cool, aren’t I?

More soon.

Published by

Jez

Contact me by email at: dubioustaste26@gmail.com Follow me on Twitter: @atastehistory Or do both. Whatever.

9 thoughts on “Home Furnishings”

    1. I had to, mate, just had to. I mean I know the rave scene was supposed to be the new punk, all self-made in bedrooms, but there has to be standards.

  1. I briefly considered a door mat saying ‘Before you ask, no I will not turn the music down’, but thought that it probably wouldn’t get me off on the right footing with my new neighbours.

    1. An aunt once sent me a “welcome to your new home” card, which had the words PARTY HOUSE!!! emblazoned on the front, and it took every ounce of my strength to resist putting it in the window.

    1. Can’t say I’d ever heard of it either until I stumbled upon it, but I guess there’s a market for bespoke anything these days

  2. Nice one, Jez. I’ve have been tempted by One Step Beyond (Madness) or Into The Abyss (Sex Gang Children) but I think you’ve nailed it, grammar included.

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