“In the End, It Took Me a Dictionary to Find Out the Meaning of Unrequited” #2

If I were more organised, then:

a) this would have been the first post in the series, and

b) I would have posted it on a Saturday.

Such is life.

I can’t really go any further in this thread without posting the song that the thread title is lifted from. I wish I’d chosen something else, for two reasons:

  1. I’ve posted this song before, and
  2. As the title of the series, it takes ages to type out every time.

But here you go: the greatest song ever about unrequited love. A song we can all identify with, I think, set as it is in school years, when we all had a crush which wasn’t reciprocated.

Didn’t we…? Can’t just have been me, surely?

Mine was with a girl called Fiona. Adored her from the moment I clapped eyes on her. But she really wasn’t in the least bit interested.

And then, one day in double English, I was messing about and as a punishment was made to sit on “the girls’ table” for the rest of the term. Right in between Fiona and the equally admired Tammy.

This was no punishment, thought I (and several other boys in my class). This was an opportunity.

Twice a week, I got to show her that I was not just really quite good at English, but also that I was the funniest, most charming bloke they could ever meet. A catch!

It seemed to work for a while. I distinctly recall her relaying a joke that I had made to some of the other girls. A joke about carrots. And not even a rude joke about carrots.

Hey! Don’t judge me! Root vegetables was the subject matter I was handed, and I’m not ashamed to admit that I ran with it.

Alas, Fiona remained impervious to my charms, and shortly afterwards her family moved away, shifting her to a different school.

I like to think me moving seats and her moving school weren’t linked in anyway, but you never know. It’s possible.

It wasn’t even a particularly good joke about carrots, if I’m honest.

It’s all downhill from here.


Billy Bragg – The Saturday Boy

If ever I think someone needs some Billy in their life, that’s the song I go for. 100% conversion rate so far. If you’ve always steered clear of Billy because you don’t like his politics, pop that prejudice away for a moment and give that a listen.

More soon.


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Contact me by email at: dubioustaste26@gmail.com Follow me on Twitter: @atastehistory Or do both. Whatever.

11 thoughts on ““In the End, It Took Me a Dictionary to Find Out the Meaning of Unrequited” #2”

  1. Madeleine W. She led me a merry dance.

    As to your two points above:

    1) Some songs are worth writing about more than once. Some songs should be written about every week.

    2) There is this thing computers can do…and don’t quote me on this, because I’m hardly Sir Clive Sinclair…called Copy & Paste. It’s really quite useful. (As I have discovered since using the friggin’ infinity symbol in the title of one of my recurring posts.)

    As to the unrequited love business, I’m always reminded of another of Billy’s offerings on the same subject…

    “She cut her hair and I stopped loving her.”

  2. Great subject and song…
    Mine was Nick Perkins. He was 11, he was gorgeous and he knew it. I once made it into his Top 10 (he had a list of girls in the class which changed weekly!) which nearly made me faint, but I think it was only because I somehow managed to make him laugh with a joke too (which I still remember, but it wasn’t about root vegetables.)
    So, now I just have to ask – do you remember your carrot joke…?

    1. Sort of… Not really….If I did, it would have been included, trust me! It was some lame gag about carrots improving your eye sight. Not worth repeating even if I could remember it, I think

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